When Sober Curious Strikes Past Dry January

Firstly of 2025, the previous US Surgeon Normal issued an advisory on the hyperlink between alcohol consumption and cancer risk. Whereas this can be a sobering name to motion, there is no such thing as a denying that sober curiosity has elevated not too long ago. From Dry January to extra manufacturers creating alcohol-free drinks to the rise of mainstream mocktails, now greater than ever even informal drinkers have gotten sober curious and analyzing their relationship with alcohol.

Final yr in Episode 146 of the FBG Podcast, Sobriety Coach, and Founding father of Sober Wild, Krysty Krywko, Ed.D, joined our EIC Alison for an interview on sobriety. In the present day we’re persevering with this dialog with Krysty. Dry January has handed however actually not the questions on what we are able to do if we’re interested by a sober (utterly alcohol free), or damp (a discount in alcohol consumption), life. 

Tam: Ought to we strategy consuming as all or nothing, particularly if we’re sober curious?

Krysty: I feel it’s a really private determination, however for those who’re any sort of a daily drinker (that means three or 4 nights every week “simply to unwind”) then alcohol is impacting the best way you are feeling – mentally, emotionally, and bodily – your physique simply doesn’t know there’s one other method. In case you’re not consuming through the week, however then consuming a few bottles of wine over the weekend, you by no means actually get the possibility to see how your physique and thoughts reacts to no alcohol. Anna Lembke, in her e book, Dopamine Nation: Finding Balance in the Age of Indulgence, talks about how “abstaining from our drug of alternative for a minimum of 4 weeks offers clarifying behaviors. Perception that merely will not be potential whereas we proceed to make use of.” In different phrases, you haven’t any concept how shitty you actually really feel whenever you’re utilizing a substance that’s making you are feeling shitty. It often takes a number of weeks in your physique to regulate to the truth that you’re not consuming a poisonous substance.

Tam: Are there issues/greatest practices to go from Dry January to extra of a Damp February and past? 

Krysty: So, I don’t actually know the reply to that query, it actually will depend on what your motivation was for Dry January. Was the plan to simply see for those who might make it with out consuming for 30 days? Or have been you searching for actual well being advantages? Or did you notice that your consuming has elevated over the previous few years and you understand you wanted to take a break?

Moderation, which is de facto what Damp February is all about, doesn’t work for lots of people. In case you spend numerous time bargaining with your self each time alcohol is concerned, which results in numerous “guidelines” round your consuming, you would possibly need to take a step again.

You may not even concentrate on these guidelines. They’ve simply grow to be a part of your inside chatter. That chatter would possibly sound like this:
I’m not going to drink on my own.
No consuming earlier than 5:00 p.m.
No arduous alcohol through the week
I’m solely going to drink white wine (or beer, or vodka, and so on.)
I can’t have greater than two drinks on every week evening.
I can’t drink greater than two nights in a row. 

The top days of my consuming have been stuffed with elaborate and arcane guidelines that have been continuously shifting as I broke one after one other. I used to be letting myself down every day, and that sort of self-disappointment was like a continuing stream of micro-cuts to my soul.

Take a second and take into consideration why you’re placing so many guidelines round your consuming. You would possibly simply resolve that it’s not price it.

Tam: If somebody is studying this pondering “I don’t have an issue with my alcohol consumption however need to take a extra aware strategy to what I eat/drink,” what questions ought to be explored when interested by alcohol consumption? 

Krysty: One of many first issues we have to do is transfer away from the language round consuming and the idea that there are “drawback drinkers” after which everybody else. This results in disgrace, stigma, and judgement.

A way more helpful, and practical, mannequin to make use of on the subject of speaking about alcohol is the thought of consuming occurring on a spectrum. That’s the place the thought of “grey space drinker” emerged from, which encompasses everybody from the every-now-and-then drinker to those that are bodily hooked on alcohol. The fantastic thing about this mannequin is that you simply don’t must hit any type of a all-time low earlier than you’ll be able to discover your relationship with alcohol, you get to resolve at any level on the spectrum what’s best for you.

In case you’re able to get trustworthy with the function alcohol performs in your life, I’d counsel sitting down with a pen and paper and answering the next questions. Get inquisitive about your self, and take the time to reply actually. Don’t cloud your responses with disgrace, or judgement, or what your bestie goes to assume. That is about you and the one life that you’ve got, and whether or not or not you desire a poisonous substance to play a job within the creation of that life. 

Is alcohol nonetheless working for me?
How is alcohol making me really feel?
What areas of my life has alcohol taken over?
Does consuming align with the individual I’m now?
What would “future you” inform “current you” on this scenario?

Tam: What if our mates have gone again to consuming after Dry January, however we are attempting to proceed. Do you have got options/suggestions for easy methods to make this a part of my life-style with my consuming mates? 

Krysty: You would possibly want to seek out new mates – haha. However, critically, if your pals actually respect and assist you within the selections you make in your life, then it shouldn’t be an issue. However, in the event that they’re regularly making an attempt to push you to start out consuming once more, whining that you simply’re not enjoyable anymore, or that one shot of tequila received’t do any hurt, then you definitely would possibly must rethink who you’re spending time with. It’s essential to determine for your self what you need to do with the time that you’ve got, and the folks you spend it with. 

Moreover, in case your buddy group is closely immersed in consuming tradition – that means most social actions revolve round alcohol – then you definitely would possibly want to seek out some new peeps that love to do various things.

Tam: Any favourite “drink” hacks to exchange that Friday evening cocktail? 

Krysty: I’m essentially the most primary sober individual round – and I’m proud of consuming a seltzer on my sofa to unwind after a busy week. However, I do know that individuals have totally different wants, and I get that within the early days of going alcohol-free you may want one thing slightly extra thrilling. Fortunately, the alcohol-free market is on hearth! There are such a lot of merchandise in the marketplace – assume flavored seltzers, glowing teas, alcohol-free beers, wines, and spirits, kombuchas – I actually might go on and on. I’m regularly impressed on the locations the place I discover alcohol-free drinks – Goal, Dealer Joe’s, Entire Meals, common grocery shops, and native alcohol-free bottle retailers are beginning to supply such all kinds. My solely warning is be intentional when utilizing alcohol-free merchandise, particularly issues like alcohol-free wine or beer. In case you’re downing a bottle of alcohol-free wine most nights of the week, it’s sort of like ripping off one bandage and placing on one other, and also you would possibly need to discover why you’re caught in the identical behaviors. 

Did you do Dry January this yr and preserve a dry or damp February? What’s your sober curious hack? ~ Tam